1. When the list of ingredients is split up into like three different sections.
I’m already tired.
2. When the directions say to mix stuff together, chill it, then cook it, then let it cool.
So…I’m not eating it until tomorrow then?
Know what’s not complicated to make? This Tamale Pie by cooksimple. Seriously. It’s in the name.
3. Pulling the food out of the oven 12 times and it’s still not done in the middle.
I JUST WANT TO EAT.
4. Getting ready for a party and remembering that you said you’d make something.
Ok just bring a plate and pick up a pie at Safeway on the way over, maybe they won’t know the difference.
(Pssst, Milas Foods can help you be a party hero with no work – spread some Roasted Pepper and Artichoke Bruschetta on toasted baguette slices and potluck like a pro)
5. Putting something on the stove and sitting down to catch up on True Detective and then an hour later you start to smell something weird:
I SAID I WASN’T GOOD AT THIS.
6. Realizing you’re missing some ingredients once you’ve already started cooking:
Salt? These are cookies. They’re not salties. Silly recipe.
7. When you get overconfident and try to cook something fancy:
This is the universe telling me to just order pizza.
8. When you make plans with a friend to go out and then they say they’re tired and just want to make something at home:
I’ll preheat the oven. It’s…this button, right?
9. “What are you bringing to the potluck?”
Alcohol. Got a problem with that?
10. When you get home and all the actual dinner food is stuff you’d have to make:
Do not underestimate the lengths I will go to not cook.
11. When you follow a recipe all the way to the end and it turns out edible:
Praise be to Jesus and also with you yaaaaaaasssss Food Network here I come.
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